Winning in Defeat

by Erik Neilson

When life is going good...things are good. When life is going bad...things are going bad. A couple of months ago I was feeling good. I was working out with this new aggressive routine and feeling good. I was eating healthy and really staying on track with the diet and exercise. Then I got sick. I lost a week of exercise. Then I went on vacation for a week and ate junk food for a week with no exercise. Then I came back and was still sick and hurt my lower back while trying to exercise. Then I couldn't sleep, or exercise, or cough without hurting. In the midst of all this I lost all incentive to eat healthy...so I went ahead and gained 5 pounds. Like the old commercial said, "If you're going to go, go big."

Some of us do this in our spiritual lives. Obviously winning and losing football games is somewhat subject to how the other team performs. But your spiritual performance is largely, okay "entirely", based on you. And when you're doing good in your problem areas...things are good, right? And when you're struggling in your problem areas, go big! Feel defeated! Let your hair down, and blow it big time! If you've already sinned against God why not do something really bad? If you've already hurt your marriage why not really blow it? If you haven't been in the word, why not skip prayer and church too? If you're feeling ashamed over something, why not give people something to really talk about?

Now of course I wouldn't recommend this kind of thinking, it's ridiculous! But we do that all the time. Satan lures us into some trap and like a bumbling sheep we head right in. We lost our temper, blew our top, drank too much, said too much, or didn't say enough. And then what do we do? Give up. Withdraw. Sit in a kidddy-pool of self-loathing pity. Deny it. Pretend like it didn't happen. Snap at our wife when she brings it up. What does all this sound like? DEFEAT.

Do you hate losing that bad? Is one mistake, or a whole series of mistakes enough to derail your faith? Is that thing you did so severe that it merits months self-inflicted spiritual punishment? None of us would say "yes" to that question if posed to us but many of us say "yes" with our actions. We need to learn to win in our defeats. To not let one defeat turn into an attitude of defeat, or the downward spiral that comes with a defeated attitude. So how to do we do that?

1. Remember that we sometimes lose the battle but we've already won the war. (See Rom 8:37)

2. Realize that Satan doesn't just lure us into traps, he beats us over the head with our failures. Remember he's the accuser, he's that voice saying "loser, wimp, coward, pathetic, give up, feel ashamed). Don't listen to that voice. Shut it out at every cost. It is not the Holy Spirit of God that says those things to you, it is the unholy spirit of our unholy enemy.

3. Remember that we're in a marathon not a sprint. We have our whole lives to try and follow Christ. And along the way we're going to make some mistakes...probably numerous mistakes. More important than making mistakes is recovering from them. Learning not to throw in the towel prematurely. Learning to fall off the horse and get back on again.

4. Every time we fail we have an opportunity to get stronger or slump into apathy. Don't be so afraid of failure that you stop trying. Don't be so overwhelmed with one mistake that you make a whole series of them. Don't miss your opportunity to learn from your mistakes and know different next time. This is how we learn. Ask "what did I learn? What could I do differently next time? Who do I know that could help me with this problem? God has already forgiven me for this, but have I forgiven myself? If I sinned against someone else, have I made it right?"

5. Lastly, be confident. The Lord is on your side! Be optimistic, with God all things are possible. Be humble. Pride comes before the fall. Be strong. The enemy preys on the weak. Be confident. The Spirit of the living God walks with you. Be honest. You'll never change if you're lying to yourself. Be a warrior. Don't quit fighting until the fight is over!